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Sassea Sails

SAILING, METAPHORS, ADVENTURE,

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Quips and Quotes

Quips and Quotes is designed to provide valuable insightful thoughts

Sailmeom.com

Found this website and believe it is worth sharing. Here is an excerpt that speaks to me. This is especially true after my soliloquy on Sea of Life Parts I and II which was posted a few minutes ago. How timely???

3) Know the difference between fear and anxiety.

After reading a really wonderful series of blog posts by a fellow sailor and therapist, I know that what I feel is actually anxiety.  Not panic-attack level, medication-necessary anxiety, just run-of-the-mill Jewish Grandma worry. Understanding more abouthow my brain works has been helpful. It hasn’t cured me,,,but perhaps reading up on how you feel can make a difference. By understanding what’s happening in your brain chemistry,You can let feelings pass through you and acknowledge them, and ultimately let them go in a moment of zen, or treat them professionally if necessary.

http://www.sailmeom.com/stories/2016/10/25/fear-anxiety-boats

On the Sea of Life, Part II

As stated in the Sea of Life Part I blog entry, each line I read in the poem below was questioned. My brain kept repeating, ‘what if’ until it reached such a crescendo that I had to literally get out of my easy chair and write about it to help quell the voices within. Each line in the poem as it was presented are in the left column. On the right is my response as I rationalize my behavior in order to make sense out of my choices.  At the least doing so became an interesting insight into my cynicism. . . Let me know your thoughts . . .

There is so much more to life than finding someone who will want you, or being sad over someone who doesn’t What if finding someone who will want you is fulfilling? Ever watch the gleam in the eyes of people in their 70s or 80s holding hands as they stroll along?

Sadness is a normal part of rejection in our bitter sweet life. What if one allows a limited amount of time to be sad while allowing time to be happy in each day. What if I quit being sad over my husband’s death? That would be the ultimate sadness….

There is a lot of wonderful time to be spent discovering yourself without hoping someone will fall in love with you along the way What if I have spent my life discovering myself without hoping someone will fall in love with me along the way, but what if my being is overwhelmed with the quest to taste love’s lasting pleasure?
And it doesn’t need to be painful or empty What if we need pain to feel relief?
You need to fill yourself up with love What if it gets tiring? What if a message from a friend adds to fulfillment?
Not anyone else What if others want to add love to your life?
Become a whole being on your own What if you are a whole being? What if being whole needs defining?
Go on adventures What if my adult life has been an adventure? Buying my own sailboat, teaching myself how to sail, sailing solo from Bermuda to Florida? These are not adventures,,,, surfing in Jeffreys Baai, trekking the Lares Valley
Fall asleep in the woods with friends What if I have slept in the woods with friends and along?
Wander around the city at night What if I spent more nights I can remember or count wandering the streets of New York City? It doesn’t get more citied than New York…
Sit in a coffee shop on your own What if I spent many a morning or mid day sitting in a coffee shop alone? What if I told you at age 21 I did so in the French Quarter? Just sipping a latte watching others come and go?
Write on bathroom stalls Yea, what if I told you I have written on walls around the world?
Leave notes in library books What if I have written and continue to leave notes in books I read, whether in the library or in a campground, marina book swap.
Dress up for yourself What if I took a pix of myself wearing my brand new size 27 stretch skinny jeans, that I proudly sasshaed around in, and didn’t need a complement to stick my chin up, and boobs out, cause I knew I looked good!
Give to others What if I continually donate time and money to others?
Smile a lot What if I smile most of the day? Even when I was at Linda’s I practiced the wonderful mantra she shared with me, “chin up, boobs out, smile, smile, smile.
Do all things with love What if I believe I do all things with love? I avoid judgement… I respond
Don’t romanticize life like you can’t survive without love What if romanticizing just comes into my brain? I can survive, I will survive, that is not an issue. What if I choose to survive with a mate with whom there is mutual love?
Live for yourself What if living for myself is the only way I can live? Indeed I firmly believe everyone does. Even Mother Theresa lived for herself; her way of living for herself meant helping the poor, indigant and ill.
Be happy on your own What if I can be happy on my own but the daunting ‘work’ to live on my own is eased with the loving companionship of a mate
It isn’t less beautiful, Promise What if beauty is in the eye of the beholder

 

“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people together to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”     Antoine de Saint-Exupery (taken from Ellen MacArthur’s book, ‘Full Circle’)

A Day in Our Life

This is a bit longer than my usual quips and quotes, but thought it poetic justifiable:

Yesterday, February 24, 2017,  started as a semi-normal day when you consider we had to leave the house at 7:30 am to get Ron to his scheduled out patient hernia surgery. As you know, he times everything to the precise second. Because I might have to drive him home we chose to take my brand new VW bug. Being smart enough to always let him drive to avoid having two drivers in the car,  I handed Ron the keys after he slid into the driver’s seat. “Remember to put your foot on the brake in order for the car to start,” I whispered.

 

The gear shift was in Park and his right foot was on the brake. Methodically he looked at the slot where the key goes in,  then proceeded to slide it in. The expression on his face told me something didn’t work. “Is your foot pressing on the brake all the way down?” I cautiously asked. No reply.

 

After two or three attempts at getting the key to turn the ignition on, I feared I may have gotten something on the key. Frustrated I said, “Hold on a sec, while I go back in the house to get the extra key!” As fast I could scrounge the house key to unlock the door I then ran upstairs grabbed the extra key, relocked the door to the house and jumped back in the car. All to no avail.

 

Ron tossed the keys on the dashboard. “Let’s just take the truck,” he exclaimed. Knowing there is no way I would drive his beast of a truck he continued, “If they ask if you are driving me home from the hospital you say YES.” In no time we were truckin’ off to the Naples Hospital.

 

The surgery went fine. While he was under anesthesia I called roadside assistance. They would send someone after 5 pm to be sure we were back home. At 6 pm I called road side assistance to make sure they were on their way. Lo and behold the Naples car fixers decided they didn’t want to come the 50 miles to Everglades City. So, the wise roadside people called a service in Miami, a mere 108 miles away. It was well after dark when I had drifted off to sleep in the middle of some weird shoot –em up movie we were watching, when the car guy shows up.

 

I am so disappointed I missed this show. Not the movie but rather the show in which Ron gets in the bug to show the mechanic that the key won’t allow the ignition to rotate to the on position. “Turn the wheel,” bellowed the astute mechanic. Word has it that Ron turned the steering wheel but an inch and walla, kajalla, the ignition ignited.

 

Ron apologized for our lack of creativity in solving the problem. The gracious mechanic smiled as he got in his tow truck for his return journey of 108 miles back across the Tamiami Trail.

 

 

 

Holden and Folden

You gotta’ know when to hold ’em

Know when to fold ’em

Know when to walk away

Know when to run

as song by Kenny Rogers

Caterpillars and Butterflies

Engraved on a tombstone at the cemetry where my friend, Linda’s parents and brother – in- law are buried:

TO THE CATERPILLAR IT IS THE END,

                                                    TO THE BUTTERFLY IT IS THE BEGINNING!

 

Change Your Thinking/ Make Someone Happy

Change Your Thinking 

It will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking..

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. 

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.

His bed was next to the room’s only window. 

The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. 

The men talked for hours on end.

They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation..

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. 

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.

Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. 

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine this picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon, the man by the window described a parade passing by. 

Although the other man could not hear the band – he could see it in his mind’s eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. 

Days, weeks and months passed. 

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep.

She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. 

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. 

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.

He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed. 

It faced a blank wall. 

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. 

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, ‘Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.’ 

Epilogue: 

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. 

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can’t buy. 

‘Today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present .’ 

The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.

 

Do not keep this letter. 

I pray you will forward it to all your friends

Received from an annonymous e-mailer on 5/21/2016

Do You Want Cheese With That?

No one likes a whiner…Yet, most of us have to deal with someone expressing a complaint, even if it is a legitamate one.  Skip Weisman, Workplace Communication Expert,  may have the perfect solution. Skip suggests showing empathy for the complainers  concern and confirming how they want to deal with finding a solution.

Skip gives this example of what you might say to the complainer.

   I can see you’re really (emotion expressed) about (the situation/experience that is the cause).

   Can I ask you a question?

   Are you telling me this because you just want to vent, or because you’d like my help/advice in     resolving the issue.

Use open arms, not flailing around, but not crossed over your chest. Look relaxed. Make eye contact.

For more information and ways to improve your personal and professional relationships visit Skip’s website.   info@WorkplaceCommunicationExpert.com

Although geared for the workforce, the concepts and suggestions are just as effective with your spouse, your friend, or your child.

Secrets and Confessions

Secrets and Confessions are all part of a life well lived. 

Dan O’Brien, The Contract Surgeon, page 100

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